May 14, 2017

Ah, Mother’s Day. The day people around us shower their mothers with endless thanks and public praise in social media posts about how precious and wonderful they are, often forgetting that so many of us in the LGBTQ community struggle with strained or estranged relationships with our mothers. There is no easy cure for the hurt and neglect that one might be experiencing on a day like today, but there is power in sharing our stories of strength and resilience in the face of our mother’s’ abandonment. Perhaps, there’s even a little bit of a brightside.

Studies show that we are destined to end up just like our mothers, or to partner with people who exude similar traits to our mothers. While you may not be able to fight your genetic code, you can certainly take a moment to celebrate the fact that in your mother’s absence, you’re more likely able to grow into the person you want to be, rather than the person you’ve been groomed to be.

For those of us without mothers, our mothers’ abandonment could actually be the best thing that’s ever happened to us. If your mom was a yeller, maybe you won’t be a yeller. If your mom was a narcissist, maybe you won’t be, because you know how it feels when someone doesn’t put your needs before their own. Maybe in the face of this abandonment, you’ve become a stronger, healthier, happier version of you. And if you feel like you’re not at your best, you can take steps right now, right this very minute, toward becoming a happier, healthier you.

If you have a mother who stayed by your side and accepted you for your sexuality and/or gender identity, you can take a moment to celebrate that modeling, and take some time to be there for those around you who may not have had the same luck of the draw. Invite your friends or loved ones out to a movie, a brunch, or an LGBTQ affair in your local area to remind them that they have a new family, a family that loves and accepts them no matter who they are or how they identify.

If you’re lucky enough to have a loving, supportive, accepting family, we are happy for you! But, if you’re feeling alone, sad, or abandoned on a day like today, we want you know that the LGBTQutie family is here. LGBTQutie is an entire network of support, connecting you with like-minded individuals, many of whom have had similar experiences such as you. So, get online, click on a profile, and get connected. There’s strength to be found in our community, especially on days such as this.

Here at LGBTQutie, we celebrate all mothers— and nontraditional family constructs—on Mother’s Day. Every family starts with a beautiful partnership. We hope you find it here, at